When discussions of genders occur, women often receive several unfair allegations leveled at them regarding their expectations within relationships. Makers of entertainment amplify one or more aspects giving stilted views for either comedy or added drama.
Sadly, these same creators do not cop to their penchant for exaggeration and occasional character assassination. Let’s take a look at the expectation stereotype, a closer version of the truth and the underlying reasons most of these exist.
“Guys don’t know how to clean anything”
Stereotype: Picture a partner with a hand on her hip complaining about the state of a part of the home. Feel free to insert either a place where food is prepared, a state of undress occurs or expectations of intimacy rule. Some women take matters into their own hands thinking if they want something clean they have to do it themselves, like someone’s mother.
Truth: Everyone, regardless of being a woman or a man, feels more comfortable in a clean environment. There is a reason no one ever enters a four-star hotel anticipating the trash and dirty towels from the last guest still in the room. Even accounting for personal preference, things like cleanliness point to more than the state of one’s home. It can indicate a level of care and attention one puts toward everything else too.
“Guys never make plans”
Stereotype: An extreme viewpoint of this expectation calls for the man to figure out, often without being told, what his partner wants and create a magical experience. While containing some flaws, this assumes the woman wants no hand in the course of her own life. Most women cringe at this depiction because they will not want to have their lives, even the enjoyable parts, dictated to them.
Truth: Many women want guys to make an effort in regards to planning aspects of the relationship. They may witness how things, like hobbies, friend or jobs, receive attention and long to have a fraction of it spent on them. Both parties in the relationship want to feel important enough receive some attention.
“Guys only think about one thing”
Stereotype: Picture a put-upon woman forced to fend off countless advances from a guy who pokes, prods and pinches until she feels she’s at the end of her rope. Is it any wonder the idea of obsessed men objectifying their partners spawns reticent women who feel they must prevent attacks upon their virtue?
Truth: First, women enjoy physical intimacy as well, so pushing an extreme proves unrealistic. Second, no person wants to be reduced to solely an object for another person’s pleasure. Women seem to think beyond their momentary needs. Being desired is important, but not at the expense of the person.
Looking at the three examples, along with countless others, one can see how the expectation started from a reasonable place: to be valued, cared for and receive attention. None of these things prove bad from a baseline level. Trouble happens when the normal becomes overblown. Once the exaggerated becomes accepted then people start to respond to it rather than looking to the individual.
Ultimately, everyone has expectations within relationships. The media may have latched onto and exaggerated women who have the self-possession and confidence to voice what they want. Respecting each other allows each person in the relationship to have their needs met. It all starts with treating people as individuals and not as works of fiction.
Did you know that it’s actually healthy and normal for a man to pull away in a relationship? Would you like to know why your man pulls away in your relationship? Then watch this free presentation and discover how having your man pull away can actually make your relationship better. Click here now: