As I am sitting here writing this, I am laughing. It’s really better than crying. Besides, crying wouldn’t do any good anyway. It would change nothing. I’m more of a doer. I like doing things, solving problems, changing things. So I solve my problems, and I don’t waste a lot of time talking about them anymore. I get things done, and I feel happy.
Many who will be reading this know me. They know I’m a US Army veteran. Some have paid close attention to my process of healing. There’s a lot of things they don’t know, and so I’ll share some of my journey here. Just the highlights. I don’t want anyone getting bogged down in the details. Then I want to share with you what you can do to change your life, and why you want to live the best life possible.
I am the adult child of an alcoholic. It was violent. I am the victim of sexual assault. The VA told me that my time in the Army aggravated my situation. I raised three kids on my own after I divorced an alcoholic husband. I graduated from college, served in the National Guard too, and remarried, and when that marriage failed, I ended up being diagnosed as bipolar, a diagnosis I disagreed with. I worked my way off that, and when I got off the drugs and disability, I finally started to feel better. The bottom of my life fell out when two of my grandkids died within six weeks of one another in 2005.
It took seven years to get to where I could think about them and not cry every time. I didn’t even realize I had Post Traumatic Stress until I started trying to help other veterans get well. I ended up homeless in 2014. That was a major wake up call for me. It was time to put my life back on track and do it for good and finally heal from all the baggage I had picked up along the way.
Being involved in veterans’ issues didn’t help. Being involved in farm murders and white genocide in South Africa didn’t help either. I kept getting sidetracked. I kept getting criticized for my efforts. Nothing was ever good enough for those I was trying to help. Worse, there were those in the veterans’ community in both the US and South Africa who decided to go after me, destroy my business and life and push me to suicide. It was ugly.
I had started doing the Healing Codes in 2013. I’ve been doing them ever since. In a nutshell, it’s energy medicine. You use energy based on the principles of quantum physics to heal. It’s the way Jesus heals. Sounded crazy to me when I first started doing it. All I can say is that it works. It feels amazing.
Since I began this process, I’ve learned a few things. The first was that I had a lot of toxic emotions buried inside of me.They were behind all my health problems because 95 percent of illness is rooted in stress. Toxic emotions manifest themselves in the body to cause disease.
It’s not what happens to us that matters. It’s what we choose to do with what happens to us. When we don’t heal our traumas and get rid of the baggage, it accumulates and cause us more pain. Worse, we cause others pain, and we don’t even realize it.
I’ve never met a sick person who had healthy mental health. It’s why I don’t take advice from sick people. What I’ve learned from that experience is that the more we hang out with others, the more we become like them. I am learning to avoid the sick for this reason. Sickness will rub off on you. I find myself complaining. I’m irritable. I don’t like the way that feels so I’m learning to hang out with people who have the kind of things in life that I want out of life.
There were other things I learned too, and I want to share these with you because they apply to you too.
1. Each of us is unique. In and of that makes us special.
Each of us has a purpose and mission in life, and when we don’t live according to that purpose and mission in life, we end up unhappy, dissatisfied and miserable, and we tend to take out that frustration on those around us.
That’s the way it worked for me. That’s what I see in the veterans’ community too. Currently 69 percent of the suicides for veterans occur among those over 50.
2. We’re all equal at our core. We all have great worth.
What we get out of our lives isn’t the result of what we deserve per se. It’s about what we think we deserve. Our belief systems are crucial because we act on what we believe. A faulty belief system is the most toxic and poisonous thing in the world. Don’t believe me? Look at NAZI Germany, Communist China and most Muslim countries. Hurt people hurt people. Hurt people commit crime. Happy people don’t hurt people, and happy people don’t commit crime. They make the world a better place.
(If you want to follow up on this one, I highly recommend you read The Secrets of Deliberate Creation. It was a mind blower for me. Having to take 100 percent responsibility for my life when I had been hurt was so hard. I did it because I learned that I could forgive and heal.)
- Comparison is the happiness killer. I have often been compared to others by others, especially in the veterans’ community, and I always fall short. The problem with this comparison is that I don’t have the same skills, and I didn’t have the same opportunities as those I was being compared to. The comparison is really unfair. The saddest part of all this is that it’s other veterans who are doing it.
Shouldn’t we support one another instead of criticizing one another? I just don’t understand. I’ve always done my best to tell the truth in the veterans’ community. Unfortunately, some find the truth about our community offensive. So many are dying, and yet they don’t see the truth about our problems nor is there nearly enough personal responsibility. The trend will continue until we recognize that we have to actually look at the real problems and solve them.
- Getting well is difficult, and there are plenty of times when it seems nearly impossible. There were days I couldn’t get out of bed because I was so depressed. For those who struggle with physical illness, they tend to marginalize and minimalize those of us who have problems like depression and Post Traumatic Stress. This is not a mental illness, and it should be treated that way. It is the result of unhealed trauma, and when that trauma doesn’t heal, it only gets worse.
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